See, not every Vineyard abode is designed for vegetation mazes on the outside and swatch piles on the inside. Apartments, condos, and guest cottages may not have a vast lawn, or any lawn, but they can still be landscaped. Some of these dwellings only have one room, but that room can be accessorized with the best of them.
I say, no longer shall these tiny-house and apartment dwellers be excluded from the Home & Garden industrial machine. Island homes all deserve to be equally elite, no matter how petite. And now they can, thanks to these easily accomplished Home & Garden Lite tactics:
Guest Quarters:
A lot of huge houses have guest quarters. The gift of lodging, however, is one that guests can’t take with them. Give a gift that keeps on giving, and give them ACTUAL QUARTERS. Quarters for guests are far superior to guest quarters. They are much more affordable than adding a wing to your place, take up very little space, and will save your friends’ days whenever they frequent parking meters or laundromats back on the mainland.
Anonymous Remodel:
Telling others about an ongoing remodel generates immediate Home & Garden cred. Luckily, most people’s attention spans are short enough that they won’t follow up with specific questions about what exactly is being updated. So make that “big project” any size you want. Suddenly, you’re not just replacing that old towel rack, you’re remodeling it!
Free Time Decoration:
Pools, tennis courts, midlife-crisis cars –buying and maintaining these items can consume the majority of your time and money. What happens if you don’t have to worry about any of these things? You acquire a whole barrel of time and money! Use this winning combination to take on some new hobbies. Learn how to fly fish, or sing a cappella and audition for the
Vineyard Sound. Document these fun times and hang the pictures on your walls as trophies of your stress-free existence. In no time you’ll be the envy of all your buddies with boats.
Air Plant Fiesta:
Why grow a bunch of odds and ends in the ground when it’s possible to just hang several dozen plants from the ceiling*? The Air Plant Fiesta is the gravity-defying garden concept of the future. Water everything while watching television and looking out the window at deer that can’t destroy any of this greenery unless they have a key to your place!
*Side note:
It is possible to grow vegetables from the ceiling. An anonymous Oak Bluffs native dwelling in Astoria, New York, with his girlfriend and small black cat has discovered that the combination of water damage and mold can cause mushrooms to grow from a bathroom ceiling. This is certainly not recommended, and never to be branded a Mushroom Fiesta.
